Posted in Dresses

Dress Shopping and Other Terrors of the Natural World

Hey, yall, I know we’re not normally the most ladylike, or the girliest…but, that doesn’t matter because we’re juniors and have prom dress shopping coming up(even if it’s a banquet where we go to school and has more restrictions and requires adding material that didn’t exist before to practically every formal dress you can find). So, we’re being girls and doing girl things. Like shopping…

 

This of course results in things like needing to sell your ribs, possibly your spleen or maybe multiple parts of your body because you’re getting tired of trying to find things that would work.

Or finding a dress online that DOESN’T EXIST ONLINE BUT YOU JUST PUT IT ON YOUR BODY HOURS EARLIER IN A STORE!!! The struggle is real. The struggle is so, so real.

Another problem figuring out how to convince your friends to “just try” something even if they don’t think it would fit completely or look perfect. Especially when they have something in mind already.

Yeahhhh…it’s not me she’s talking about, promise(I don’t think nope, it’s not you) because I’ll try almost anything in the privacy of a shut door no camera dressing room.

 

But then there’s also the times when you go to a store that you’ve been dying to go to for years(since you’ve realized it was there) and then you find things you really, really like and someone else from the party finds(or tries it on after you hand it to them) a dress that is amazing on them and they end up getting said dress.*raises hand politely* I think she’s talking about the sparkle-shedding creature that I got, which means I can’t change too drastically in the next… three-ish? two-ish? three-ish? months. Which, yes, ACG totally found. So, props to her for that.

68 days, if anyone was wondering…or as far as we/I know. that’s just over two months… This is why I’m going to become a hobo or runaway or whatever you said the other day(run away and get picked up as a hitchhiker by her soulmate and then she’s going to tell me where they are so I can meet him, give him a token of approval if he deserves it[which he probably won’t but that’s just the best friend talking] and they can get on finding me a boyfriend as their next mission, simple right?).

As great as that would be, it’s not going to happen. But for that story tune in next week for Anna Can’t Imagine Herself Existing in Six Days.

 

Keep your dresses stuck, ribs in your cage, and feet on the wall.

🙂 😀 😉 😛 :O

Just… drive safely.

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Posted in ACG is Weirdo Who Demands Some Things Get Categorized While Claiming to Dislike Labeling, Fiction Land, grain of salt advice, Life and Likes

AJA Isn’t Dead Afterall

THE REDCOATS ARE COMING THE REDCOATS ARE COMING…
Oh, wait, that’s just AJA…nevermind…

I have no clue what we’re talking about, but I’m BACK, baby! It’s time to get scared! (And maybe a little scarred as well.)

Well it’s not our fault that you’re scarred. You did that to yourself. (How did I scar myself??? Invited pain and turmoil to your door…#poeticwordingforthewin Okay, but what pain and turmoil? That’s actually what I’m avoiding unless you enjoy simpering messes…) But, we can fix that with tonight’s topic of discussion…

Introducing, the one, the only, the nonexistent OWESOME!!!!

Oweome? It sounds painful, right? Well… Only it’s origin story is. (I’m so out of practice. Braaahhhh.) But I assume we are foregoing the origin and jumping straight to our idea for a hot new product!

It cleans, it heals, it soothes burns. It’s basically your dream spouse. Marry it. Marry the Owesome. I’m not sure that it’s safe to ingest or marry though so, how about we don’t? What does marriage have to do with ingesting it? It’s not a suitable option for a significant other.(I might disagree, but I’m also insane, so…It’s a worse idea than marrying your pillow or sports equipment. Maybe not sports equipment. At least this has a function.)

Anyway, the packaging looks really, really sweet–for instance, it’s like this really brilliant blue with red and yellow stars and like a dragon head on it and basically is actually made of flames and unicorns(there are special editions that don’t have dragons and are covered in seasonal and various other designs (lies. they’re all dragons. everything is a dragon) like zig zags (fancy dragons), music notes (might be dragons), sweet tea in mason jars (definitely dragons), and pickup trucks (also dragons)–and it can be found in imaginary stores everywhere. Neosporin, peroxide, rubbing alcohol, and aloe will have to step aside and make room for this all-in-one medical sensation!

Dragons do not have a hand in the production of this project (it’s one of the few drawbacks honestly) and their scales are not a part of the formula (lies.) in case anyone was wondering and concerned that part of a scaly lizard who may or may not be owned by a human (plenty of people have lizards though so…)

Fine, a honking huge scaly lizard that breathes fire stereotypically, says “waca” (that’s so spelled with a “k”) when it walks, and has giant wings and teeth that may or may not be owned by a human. I’m a dragon and no one owns me.

Owesome is cool. You should, like, buy it and stuff. But it can only be paid for with shiny objects which both Annas and dragons enjoy and horde. That can be glittery shoes or likewise shiny items…;)

Anyway, that’s what there is to it. Keep your sparkles in your heart and your daggers concealed…

😉 🙂 😛 😀

Don’t be a loser, always dictate your actions instead of doing them, and drive safely. *steals outro from ACG (sort of)*

Posted in grain of salt advice, Life and Likes

Alternative ideas…? Yeah, I had to try…

Hey, y’all! Just lil’ ole me again. AJA is MIA, presumably sleeping, so you’re stuck with me again. She’ll be back soon…maybe 🙂

Tonight, I’m going to discuss different things you MIGHT(if you were a little crazy) seriously consider to be your boy/girlfriend…no, not all of these are true or at least from experience, thank you very much *blushes and ducks head*

1. You can use any stuffed animal or plush object with a face.
Whether it’s your comforting and long time friend teddy bear or a strange fuzzy ball that has a face, whatever works as long as you believe. You might even get away with maybe a doll.

2. You can use any pillow.
You’ve heard of people kissing their pillows, how about just taking that relationship to the next level, huh?

3. Soccer ball, basketball, football, baseball, volleyball, softball, okay I think we get that I’m talking balls here!
This may be more for guys than girls but we’re all in love with our sports anyway, right? Why not just bite the bullet and admit that we want to date the embodiment-slash-symbol-slash-focus of our favorite sport?

4. Signs.
They’re easy. They will say whatever you want them to say. They’ll stay where you leave them to the best of their ability. Also, they can’t take revenge on you after you move on. 😉

5. An alibi or person of the opposite gender who owes you a favor.
We’ve all seen this one go horribly in movies and shows and whatnot but that doesn’t change the fact that if you’re seriously considering any of these to introduce to your parents, friends, or ex (or maybe even just for yourself as a self-help-anti-pity-party thing), well, you might be up for trying it because at least this is a real, animated, human choice.

There you have it! Five choices for non-boy/girlfriend boy/girlfriends! I don’t seriously suggest any of these outside of a joking situation but, hey, if you want it, go for it. I won’t judge, but the judge you go to for the wedding ceremony/certificate might laugh at you and sentence you to time with sane family and friends.

With love,
🙂 😉 😀 😛

P.S. Drive safely and eat marshmallows!

Posted in Music Monday

Music Monday 2: Why Children and Spiders Don’t Mix

Good…night, guys! (That sounds like I’m saying goodbye. I’m not. I swear. I like your faces.) It’s Monday, and you probably don’t know what that means because we haven’t really been doing this long enough for you to expect it, so I’m going to tell you. It’s time for Music Monday. *insert suggestive eyebrow raise*

We’re back and better than ever! (I haven’t slept a total of 9 hours in 72 hours! 🙂 ) Okay, not ever but we only had a half day of school, had a lunch, and we’re working on this and have an amazing song we’re planning on using tonight. *hums a tune you don’t know yet*

We were planning on discussing an amazing song. Instead we will be discussing a…not quite sanely deemed children’s song.

The…itsy bitsy spider crawled up the waterspout. Down  came the rain and washed the spider out, up came the sun and dried up all the rain and the itsy bitsy spider climbed up the spout again…”

Creepy, right? Why would you sing to your children about spiders?!? Because they’re conditioning them to not be afraid of them. Also, could the tone be any more cryptic?!? It could…

The really huge black widow creeped up the sewer pipe. Down came the waste and drowned the spider out. Out came the fumes and killed off all the life and the really huge black widow fell into the drain…

I would just like to point out, I didn’t say the words. I said the tune as in the actual way the song is sung. That’s what makes it creepy. The words are…moderately disturbing. Though, yours are ridiculously disturbing. What kills me is the way that this song is sung. All children’s songs are creep though. Let’s be real here. I mean, Ring Around the Rosy is literally about the Black Death (Bubonic Plague).  I appreciated the subtle teaching methods and subliminal messaging when I found that out though. #Imnotsadisticpromise
I appreciate it the way I appreciate horror movies. I’m also kind of scarred though from this one episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer that started with a child singing in the hallway about “the Gentlemen.” And, uh, yeah…The best part of that is our student council is called the Gentlemen. 🙂 WHY DO YOU THINK I DIDN’T VOTE FOR THEM?!? THEY’RE JUST WAITING TO STEAL OUR VOICES!!!

And we managed to turn a nursery rhyme into horror talk. Whoops. Yeah, are we good at that? Maybe.

It’s not that scary actually. But nothing is making sense anymore either though, so…

And I think we’re out of time for this session, folks…

🙂 😀 😉 😛

Sleep well, don’t be like me, and drive safely.

Posted in Life and Likes

Happy–….Merry–…Oh, whatever! It’s 2015

Hey, y’all!!!!! Happy 2015!!!! Or is it “merry 2015?” I forget…

Anyway…it’s just me toda–night, tonight. Just lil’ ole ACG. But that’s okay because I’m competent in my own rights, behind a couple of solos, and AJA is finishing up her latest masterpiece (AJA: 3 ACG:…working on it) and she’s in her own little world.

But we don’t need her to have a happy and successful post. I can do it…right? Right. *cue cheerleader echo*

As much as I hate to ruin the mood, school starts Monday and I’ll be looking forward to new looks, Scorpion(it’s a TV show on CBS for those who need a new show to watch) at eight o’clock, and the fact that it’s only a half day of school so AJA, myself, and anonymous friends and siblings that aren’t listed here will be going on a lunch date. *cue happy dance* *imaginary sweet tea sip*

Oh, yeah, and I hope to have my partner in crime (or at least the lookout for my trouble) back to help me with a musical, mystical, and magical post.(Speaking of musical, we saw the new movie Annie today and EVERYONE sang. Except the dog and some people at a restaurant but that’s understandable.)

As for now, I don’t want to get too in depth here without AJA so I’ll just leave y’all be and let you know she missed for a noble cause instead of me who tends to be because I’m lame and have to sleep or something.

In tribute…drive safely, everyone! 😉

🙂 😀 😉 ;P 😛